BACK FROM VACATION AND MY CHILD'S SCHEDULE IS ALL OVER THE PLACE...

Okay so you had a great time on your trip.....you were out doing things all day long with very little breaks. On the other hand, there may have been no breaks for naps so your little one was able to fit in a half hour here and a half hour there. Well hey I say you are on vacation so don't burn yourself out by making sure your baby gets each nap right when they are supposed to. Go with the flow ...its not like you are going to be on this schedule forever. When I am on trips I try to make sure Adalie gets at least one nap in per day because at home she takes two. That one nap could come at any time of the day so when I know there is going to be a break I try to fit a nap in if possible. When babies reach about one year of age they may start to loose their second nap. If this is the case for you then try to at least get in a short nap so that you can enjoy your child. Just remember to not push it, let it happen whenever there is a little break. Their nap may be during a quick ride to your next destination in their car seat. I have found that to be most successful in my travels with Adalie.

Well now you are back home and you are not sure how to get your baby back on schedule. Since I deal with Adalie's schedule daily I will use hers as an example.

Wake up and nurse 7:15 am
Breakfast 8:15 am
Morning nap 9:00 am
Wake up and nurse 11:00 am
Lunch 12:00 pm
Afternoon nap 1:00 pm
Wake up and nurse 3:00 pm
Snack 3:30 pm
Dinner 5:30 pm
Bath and nurse 7:00 pm
Bedtime 8:00 pm

*This schedule is not exact but each event happens around these times*

You have to jump right into the schedule as Dr. Marc Weissbluth says in Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. He says it is "boot camp again". You need to be consistent and firm. If you take your time soothing them to their "previous sleep routine over several days often fails because the child fights sleep in order to enjoy your company". In my experience our first morning back Adalie may choose to sleep in to catch up on some sleep .....well I am mean and don't let her. I make sure she is up at her usual wake time. Starting in the morning helps get the process going. Now if she has decided to wake up sooner than normal I will get up with her and wait until her morning nap time comes before she goes down again. The first day back is probably going to be a bit brutal, but it will end soon. At nine O'clock Adalie is down for a nap (if she really needs it a half hour before I will put her down sooner) after this I basically follow the schedule. If she is sleeping longer than normal during her naps I let her go over a little bit and push the rest of the schedule back as well. I make sure her afternoon nap does not go past 4:30 if the rest of her schedule was pushed back so that her bedtime is not messed up. It should only take a couple of days to get back on track.

WHAT A LITTLE PRINCESS...

So as I am feeding Adalie dinner in her high chair last night she is being so cute and adorable just eating away and smiling. She is singing a little and I think "what a cute little girl I have"! Then her dad, who is sitting at the table next to her, turns to her and makes wonderful little farting noises with his mouth. Within seconds Adalie follows his lead and begins to mimic his sounds.....how pleasant!

MANNERS....WHAT ARE MANNERS?

Do you ever have a day where your child yells at you all day long? Well I think I have those days often! However, I can't complain too much because her scream is not out of anger, but of joy. Adalie has been a screamer since about 7 months of age. I often get comments on her screaming and some people think it is so adorable as I did 4 months ago. She is very loud when she screams and can easily disrupt conversations. I think her scream translated is "I am here and I want you to know about it"! I have neighbors who live directly below me and I know they can hear Adalie all day long. I try to keep her quiet and not allow her to scream too much, but I can't and won't follow her around all day to focus her attention on something other than screaming. She is not being bad she is just loud and full of energy. I am afraid my neighbors think I beat her because they hear her so often.

Many times when I go to a public function and Adalie is screaming away as usual I get dirty looks to shut my kid up! What am I supposed to do? She is not even a year old yet and they want me to punish her because she will understand the punishment? Do they really want me to punish her for just being loud and happy? Now I know it can be annoying, but it is not harming anyone. I think a lot of the times people confuse her scream with an unhappy one if they can only hear her and not see her. So then when they see it is me and my child they look at me like "you need to learn to control your child". Oh please like you kid is so innocent!

THE WEEK OF HELL ....TEETHING

I have been at a loss and today was my breaking point.....what do you do when your child is screaming at you all day long and no matter what you do it will not help? I try to hold her she wants down, I put her down and she wants up. She will play for 2 minutes then scream for 20. I wanted to pull my hair out and scream with her, but instead of doing anything I sat there and listened while lying on the floor covering my ears.....and eventually I got a headache...which I might add I still have. I finally got the beast to bed only hoping that she will not wake again like she did last night at 1 a.m. to scream for 30 minutes uncontrollably. Again I could not do a thing for her! You know I can't wait until teething is over...it will make my life a lot easier...but to be honest it will be something new when all her teeth are in. I need to learn to deal with this thing called motherhood and enjoy it before my baby leaves me for college. Of course I enjoy it, but there are those times when I feel like I want to throw in the towel and I know all of you mothers have felt the same way at one point or another. How to deal with teething:

• Advil (that's for you)
• Tylenol (that's for the baby)
• Baby Orjeal
• Teething tablets
  
• Something cold for the baby to chew on
• Binky
• Blanky and basically anything else with the words teething written on them because when you get to the point I was at today you will try anything
  

WHAT ARE ADALIE AND I SUPPOSED TO DO ALL DAY...

When I was pregnant my biggest concern was "what the heck am I going to do all day with a baby?" Well when babies are first born the only thing they do is eat, sleep and poop, but of course I was involved in this wonderful process. I was the one to feed her, put her to bed and change her diapers. Before Adalie was born I was afraid that this still would not take up much of my time and that I would be bored all day long....well of course I was wrong because breast feeding did not come easy so I had to work at that ....then Adalie would be crying for some reason so I had to figure that out .....then it was time for a nap which I was grateful for so after I finally got her to sleep it seemed like she would wake up right away..... when actually she was asleep for an hour or two ....where did the time go? It seemed like this was what I did all day so no I was not bored. Now that she is older I am still just as busy, but it is a different kind of busy. I still feed, sleep, and change her, which does not take as much time as it did (or so I think) but now I have to figure out how to entertain her!!! She can entertain herself for about 15-20 minutes, but then I have to step in to help her because I find her screaming at me if I don't. So what are we supposed to do? I have been searching for some answers and here is what I have found (please also give me some ideas).....

• Playing outside because babies love the new scenery and of course to eat the grass
• Make hand puppets for you to entertain or for them to entertain themselves if they are older
• Make artsy books marks to put in their favorite book
• Make cards for an upcoming celebration
  
• Go to your local library to pick out books
• Check out your local library events calendar for children activities
• Attend a learning class for ages 6 months to 5 years for a fee at Gymboree
  
• Teach sign language through Sing and Sign
• Turn on music and dance and encourage your child to dance
• Read a story
• Make a help mom game by having them follow you around the house and help with cleaning and other chores
  
• Play catch
  
• Make a family book full of pictures
• Find a play group or start on in your area where your child can interact with other children

Hopefully these ideas are helpful. I plan on doing as many as possible at this point...we need stuff to do!

MY CHILD WILL ONLY EAT PRE-MADE PUREES AND IT IS COSTING ME A FORTUNE...

Okay so I want my child to get all of her fruits, vegetables, dairy, grains, and proteins in without making our family broke. I am sure you have all bought pre-made purees before and know that it costs something like $.97-$1.11 for the 2nd foods and you get two containers of it. Well this seems cheap at the time, but it adds up. Also, I think the down fall is your child will get so used to the purees that when chunks come along they spit them out. I have many many comments over the past few months complimenting Adalie about what a good eater she is. So let me back up...here is what she will eat and drink:

• anything in the 1st and 2nd food purees
• anything off of my plate and I mean anything
• 100% juice mixed with water

Well this is fine, but I need other options! I discovered my problem when I moved to the stage 3 purees. They are thicker and have chunks in them...well I did not know this until I opened the jar (because honestly who reads the labels). Well Adalie tried a few spoon fulls as she does with everything then she started spitting it out! I tried over and over and still no success. At first I thought it was the taste which was not normal because she eats almost anything. So I opened a new can and saw that she would not eat that one either. I opened a can of vegetable soup and pureed some of it, which is a cheap trick I learned from my sister-in-law, but of course Adalie spit that out too. What to do......well I decided that I need to let her be in control (something our family was already used to). I strained the vegetables of the already opened canned soup and put it on her tray. She ate those veggies up so fast I was amazed. I guess the less here is that she is growing up and I don't have to do every little thing for her. Since my new discovery I ran to the store and bought a bunch of fresh fruits and veggies and cute them up in bite size pieces and she loves it. So now if Adalie and I are outside of the kitchen I will bring in a little plate full of the chopped food and set it down in front of her so she can chow down.

Now my next problem is that not everything I want her to eat is finger food. So I was reminded of what Dr. Oz said on Oprah (If you don't know Dr. OZ he is the Dr. who appears on Oprah often to tell us all how to live healthier) he said that it is very important to start young with children on getting them to eat healthy. They need to want to eat fruits and veggies. He said that if you child refuses a food that you need to try over and over (as in each time that particular food is served) 10 times. So you would think that after 3 times you know your child doesn't like it, but according to Oz you need to keep trying...which I don't think this means force feeding, but simply offering the food. So I am actually in the process of this right now with the 3 stage food type textures. I have to admit she is getting better and better. At the beginning she would only take a couple of bites and now she eats at least half of what I give her.

Now if I can keep this up I will no longer have to buy the pre-made puree foods and I will be able to save some money. Buying fresh fruits and veggies is healthy and will go a lot further. For example just yesterday I bought a sweet potato and baked it and this will last me about 6 days and cost me about $2.00. If I were to have bought the pre-made puree for that price It would last me 3-4 days. See the difference?! I was browsing on the web for some puree recipes and I came across this one. I definitely recommend buying fresh food and making the baby food yourself because it not only is cheaper, but it will help when your child is older to eat the fresh foods because it is something that they are already used to.

7 WAYS TO HELP CALM AND SLEEP YOUR CHILD ...

Much of this information comes from a very handy book "the sleeping bible" if you will, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. Dr. Marc Weissbluth wrote this book to discuss the numerous sleeping solutions and I definitely recommend it! You do not read the book cover to cover. It is designed to read in sections based on your needs.

You do not have to use all of these techniques just use them on a needs basis when either nothing else is working or your regular soothing method needs a makeover...

1. Swaddling can be very helpful in soothing a crying child because they love to feel a little bit of physical pressure and they love the feeling of touch. In theory, babies like being swaddled because it makes them feel like they did when they were in the womb. They were restricted but felt very secure. Now, if your child is over 4 months old it may be more difficult to swaddle them because they have not experienced this form of restriction since they were in the womb. They may have a harder time adjusting to it, however, this is not always the case. When swaddling a baby it is important to get the wrap as tight as you can, but you should be able to slide one whole hand in the wrap between the child and the blanket. Additionally, the blanket choice is very important, and the fabric that works best is flannel because it sticks to itself and does not stretch. These blankets are hard to find and so the best way to get one is to make one. You can find flannel in any fabric store for fairly cheap. Just sew two cute patterns together and be sure the dimensions make a square. I like small swaddling blankets for newborns so that there is not too much extra fabric making the baby too hot. Once they get bigger I prefer to use a blanket that is 40"x 40".

The best time to start swaddling is in the hospital and most hospitals will give a crash course on how to do it. Studies show that babies who are swaddled sleep longer and have an easier time staying asleep when they are in their NREM (stage in sleep where we are easily woken up) sleep cycle. Some people will argue that swaddling your child too long can be a bad thing because the child will become dependent on the swaddle in order to fall asleep. Yes this could be a problem, so when should you stop swaddling? When the child reaches the age where they are getting out of the swaddle or act uncomfortable in the swaddle. Something that may help in transition is to swaddle their body and to leave their arms out. This way they are still feeling pressure on their bodies, but their arms are not restricted. Many people, when swaddling for the first time encounter some resistance from their baby and falsely assume that their baby hates it. Well if I did not know any better I would have thought the same thing. The baby will probably put up a fuss because they are protesting the wrap. If you are persistent, make a TIGHT wrap, pick up your baby, and add a bounce the majority of the time they will stop crying. The key is to make sure they are swaddled correctly and that it is tight. If the wrap is not tight and the baby is able to move it's arms then you need to re wrap them. Don't give up, it takes some practice!!

My little Adalie finally stopped having to be swaddled at 10 months. For awhile she was able to get out of the swaddle very easily so I started to just lay her in the crib unwrapped and after some long playing time she finally went to sleep (the playing time decreased each week). Then she became mobile and decided she was not going to go to bed but that she was going to play in her crib. One of my close friends had this problem too, and so what she did was give her daughter a bottle of water to keep the baby on her back and she went right to sleep.

HOW THE HECK DO YOU SWADDLE A BABY?


2. Pacifiers are used widely for newborn babies because of the quick soothing effect. Even when babies are in the womb they may start sucking their thumb for comfort which they will continue to do when they are out of the womb. There are many pros and cons to pacifiers, the pros being: they can calm an unhappy child, they can be thrown away (a thumb can not), and they can assist a child in getting to sleep. Some of the cons are: they can become dependent on the pacifier, they can cause dental problems later on, and when they are still learning to nurse pacifiers can interfere with the process.

According to Dr. Weissbluth you should never interfere with a baby's sucking because it is what is natural for them. He argues the claim that "if baby falls asleep while sucking, you will be creating a sleeping problem" he says that those making the above claims encourage you to force feed your baby in order to help him sleep longer. Dr. Weissbluth's argument is that it "reveals a profound ignorance about how the developing brain, not the stomach, controls sleep/wake rhythms" (Weissbluth 2003).

I believe in the pacifier, without it times could have been a lot worse. What I did was give it to Adalie 24/7 until she was about 6 months old then I only gave it to her for naps. Now this may be unique to Adalie, but I found that she was fine without it while she was awake. If ever I accidentally left it out where she could get a hold of it I would take it away from her and she would be fine (most of the time). I think that part of the reason for this was that she was at a young age when I took it away and she was not completely attached to the pacifier.

3. Catching them while they are drowsy is very key because it makes the napping and bedtime process a whole lot easier. Some of the signs that Dr. Weissbluth says to look for are:

• Decreased activity
• Slower motions
• Less vocal
• Sucking Is weaker or slower
• Quieter
• Calmer
• Appears disinterested in surroundings
• Eyes are less focused
• Eyelids and drooping
• Yawning

Usually this whole process takes about 20 minutes from start to finish so you have to act fast otherwise you will enter the overtired zone:

• Fussing
• Irritable
• Cranky

According to Dr. Weissbluth their is a magic time during these 20 minutes and if you act at the right moment then there will be no crying or very little crying.

I watch Adalie when I know it is getting close to nap time to see if she will show me any of the signs, and when I see one or two of the signs I try to get her to bed as soon as possible. However, sometimes I second guess myself because when I can tell that her playing has slowed down I can see that she is still happy so I figure she is not ready for bed. When this happens I miss the window and she goes into the overtired zone (or at least some what) then she cries for a while until she falls asleep. (Yes I am the mean mom that makes her cry, but only for 20-30 minutes after which I get her up and try again about 30 minutes later).

Try not to get too caught up in the magic time zone because you will drive yourself crazy. So if you are out and about and you see a sign of drowsiness don't feel like you have to run home because you only have 20 minutes. Give yourself a break and enjoy your day!

4. White noise is something I get made fun of for, but I am a firm believer. Some of you may not know what white noise is so let me give you an idea...



White noise contains equal frequencies of all sounds and masks distracting sounds which causes a soothing affect. Some people think the white noise is annoying but there are other forms out there. A fan, a heater or even the sound of an oven vent which was popular with one of my cousins. When there is no noise it may be harder for a baby to fall asleep. I also like the white noise because during the day I don't have to worry about waking her up from being too loud because the white noise blocks out the sounds that I make. If you would like to use white noise you can get it from most televisions when you turn to a nonexistent channel. You can also purchase a white noise cd online or what I recommend is to download it from the internet for a small price (I have not purchased from this site before, but I know it is a trusted site). Then you can have it on itunes for your ipod or you can burn it onto a cd.


Adalie has transitioned from the white noise to soft lullaby music because I have found that it has the same affect and it sounds nicer than the white noise. Many days and nights I will put her to sleep without it and the older she gets it seems like the better she does. I think she would do great if I got rid of it all together, but I still do it because I am so used to it and do not see the harm in it. I have read and heard many times that they can get addicted to it and not sleep without it, so maybe I will quit unless she is having a hard day or night.


5. Rhythmic rocking motions have a similar theory as swaddling...when a baby is in your womb they are always feeling movement and being "rocked". If you remember when you were pregnant and you did not feel your baby much during the day and then you went to lay down for bed and the baby would start kicking. This was because the baby felt little movement when you laid down and woke up. Rhythmic rocking motions are very calming for your baby. Some of the moves that I really like are:

• hold baby facing you and bounce on tippy toes.
• hold baby in cradle position with their tummy touching yours bouncing on tippy toes or in rocking chair
• swaddled with their back on your tummy while you rock them
  

6. Baby Massages have proven to be very calming for babies because their muscles are relaxed. This can be used to calm a screaming baby. I do this to Adalie on occasion when she will not calm down and she seems to enjoy it. This can also be used right before bed or a nap to relax them. I found some great step by step instructions on this website so you can give your baby a nice massage. Just be sure to be very gentle and soft with your baby during the massages.

7. Bedtime routines are great cues for your child to know that it is bedtime. A typical routine would include:

• dinner
• quiet play time
• bath time
• massage
• dress for bedtime
• read a story out loud
• place child in crib or bed with favorite stuffed animal or blanket

For Adalie this is the type of routine we like to follow, but depending on the day or our timing this may change. I don't always give her a bath because it seems to dry out her skin or because it is getting too late. She is learning that it is bedtime through this routine and cooperates most of the time. According to Dr. Weissbluth babies thrive on schedules and routines. They adapt to them and it helps you to have a happier easier child. One thing that is essential if you struggle at bed time with your child is to be consistent. This is a really big concept for older children. Especially if they keep coming out of their room asking for a drink or a hug and kiss. They need to learn that bedtime means bedtime.